CitiField

So this past Friday, Joaquin scored free tickets to the Mets game for that evening vs the Marlins. They were upper deck, section 535. Let me tell you, I'm not a Mets fan but that stadium is beautiful. Sure I had that little inkling that I'm sure would be more magnified had I been in MSG watching the Rangers NOT playing against the Devils but it's a really nice stadium. We didn't explore it very much but the Jackie Robinson Rotunda was something to look at and the Dunkin' Donuts coffee wafting through the air were definite pluses. Joaquin got the tickets from a coworker who's wife didn't want to go anymore since there was a chance of rain.

During the game, which we were incredibly late for, it seemed apparent that everyone around us were all either from the same neighborhood or were all part of a very large family/friends network. It seemed like everyone knew each other and kids were running around all over the place. And as I watched this 14 year old boy look after his polite [they would say excuse me to each other while passing through the aisle] younger brothers while his parents sat on either end of their children, I realized that this is where cops, firemen, and other city workers come from. It had that close neighborhood feel and not that I'd ever be a Mets fan but the the atmosphere there had a more familial feel to it than Yankee Stadium. Of course I haven't been to the new Yankee Stadium or the house that greed built. We shall see for ourselves at some point which is better.

AND after the game, Joaquin took me the first ever Jollibee's in the East Coast. I think so anyway lol. That burger was freaking good and of course, a buko pandan bubble tea is always welcome. Naturally it was full of Filipinos and hopefully with proven success, that location would be able to expand and offer more items on the menu.

On other news, Cavaliers got eliminated by the Magic so that kind of sucked for Cleveland, whose Indians lost against the Yankees as well that Saturday night. And I was crazy uncomfortable and sick and dehydrated due to the visiting aunt Flo. That bitch. We had planned to go to Central Park Zoo but Joaquin went to a baseball scrimmage with some coworkers MAD early [he was at the park 7am so hell no I was not up for that] and got back shortly after I woke up around 11am. Then he zonked out for 4 or so hours while I patiently waited and read my online obsession with fanfics and napped myself because hey I don't sleep well without him anyway. Then we got all showered and ordered Chinese to settle in and watch the Cavs game. And sadly, since we're both old fuddy duddies we were out around 1am anyway despite all the sleep earlier that day.

Sunday, didn't go to Rosehill. The 2 year anniversary is in one week. But before that will be my last 20 birthday. GOD, I'm 29. I'm going to kill myself if I waste another year. I'll take the 27th year sucked understatement of my life, first year without my mother. The 28th year I spent trying to not picture everyone I knew in a coffin or my oppressive need to just fucking give up but we'll not talk about that right now. So I'm hoping my 29th year is better.

I'm going to watch SVU again. Sweet sweet Mariska.... lol.

another day, another non-accomplishment

for accomplishments today, it didn't get further than waking up at around 8am. *Waking* up, not getting up mind you. At any rate, I didn't get much done today. What I did do is nothing to make note of but I will anyway because I said I'd start blogging again.

I did eat half the bag of Doritos Cool Ranch. I know, yuck. I organized that 2 containers I have that contain electronics stuff which meant I rewound the wires & actually tied them with twisty ties and put earphones in their cases if they had one. Reshuffled the pamphlets and warranties etc. I put the printer into the top shelf of the closet as it's been on the floor between the bed and window so I kept having to negotiate my footing when I wanted to open my windows. I pulled out the electric blanket from under my bed & put that in the closet shelf too. Then I proceeded to watch obnoxious amounts of television and tinker around on the internet. I also did manage to take all the Rolling Stone magazines (my subscription) that Tim had collected from the bathrooms and dumped into my room while I was away at Joaquin's this past weekend and yet none of the Time magazines (Tim's subscription) have been relocated to her room. If I ever examine that it'd be on the other blog. Lastly because I cleaned up all my electronics, I found the charger for my Creative Zen which would make a nice jogging partner; if only the little Steve Jobs on my shoulder will stop yapping on about the shuffle v3.0.

What I need to do is laundry, clean under my bed because of dust and son of dust now live there. I sorely need to do some juggling between accounts for payments and such. I'm $1200 away from owing only one organization money. 3 checks and I only have one financial headache from my past to deal with. Seriously, they should tell college kids not to get a bloody credit card. Or 2. And yes I keep telling myself I will work out because it would be unbelievably nice to not feel like a tub of lard. And no I don't have some body dismorphic or whatever the frak bs chicks buy into these days. I just meant running up the stairs from the basement to my room to catch the intro to SVU would be nice if I wasn't out of breath when I get to my room. FYI, I love hearing that guy say "heinous," don't ask me why.

Fog

I just started posting again. Yesterday was my first post on broken since January, the Inauguration in fact. I haven't been around, mentally anyway. I've been in that dark place people talk about all the time, with their therapists anyway. I have been talking to no one but the other voices in my head (for lack of better words) which obviously wasn't all that productive. I just kept going in circles and relying on emotions that were far too screwed up to be reliable.

I'm going to get a pet. Idk fish or something that I can take care of. When grapegum was all wonky, I gave her a cat. I'm pretty sure that cat wants to kill me though, or at least scratch out my ankles haha.

I'd been feeling stiff all over, sore all over, hollow on the inside. I sometimes think that I had to get there to get to wherever I'm going to end up. It kind of hurts to type right now which is really messed up. I used to be able to type at ridiculous speeds, furiously finishing my PM turnover reports so I could catch the last bus back home. People used to be in awe at how fast I had typed but now my fingers are cramping and this is nothing compared to then. Hopefully I get my speed back.

I need to get moving. Giant said that the pain from exercising is the weakness leaking out. He makes me laugh but sometimes I think he's not sure how to encourage me from not jumping over the ledge headfirst. He tries at least.